"Knowing you're close to the end is a kind of freedom. Good time to take... inventory."
You know you are growing soft and old when you... Want to become young again.
Really, I would love to relieve the past again, even if my memories are replayed from a machine.
Cringing at stupid mistakes, sighing at old regrets, laughing at retarded moments in my life, it'd make me a better person, it might help me focus more on life. It might make me more cheerful, knowing that I have faced down what I hate and fear - errors of my yesteryears.
Entering adulthood has been painful for me. I've been scarred, physically and mentally, but these lesions are important; crucial for survival, and I have to live with them till the end of my life, bearing pain and knowledge, and passing it on to whomever listens when I leave the world, with hope that my predecessor will not have to undergo the harsh pain I've endured over my short span of life.
The feeling of wanting independence, of wanting to break out of my family's "wool", of wanting to start earning my money, and saving up for huge events in my future; these.. Feelings, are what drives me. With vigor in my heart and my goals in sight, I will endure.
"The healthy human mind doesn't wake up in the morning thinking this is it's last day on earth."
Like I mentioned to my godfather, I am mentally prepared to enter NS. I will lock feelings and thoughts aside, and focus instead on learning, enjoying and enduring NS.
Despite what dear people have said to me:
"NS is fucking tough lah, I hate it, you go in sure die one lah",
"Aiya so young already get GF, sure breakup in NS one lah haiz you"
My mind won't wake up every morning dreading NS because of those comments. I will embrace whatever experience the next day brings; endure and enjoy.
"Because out of all our vast array of nightmares this is the one we choose for ourselves."
You have to remember, that in every single day of your life, every second; it belongs to you. It isn't shared, regardless of how you feel and think. And I can only hope you, will realize this, and start acting for your progression in life.
Think about, plan for, mitigate and explain to whatever drags you down, even if love is in the way.
Do not fear, because you are doing what is good for you, and for your love. You have to keep bearing this in mind, regardless of what the other party thinks.
I wish I had the determination again to study Security+ and CCNA :/ lawlawlawlawl
